Hello and Welcome

Thank you for visiting my website. My prayer is that my journey with my husband’s mental health may have a meaningful impact on your journey as well, no matter where you are at. You may notice that I have purposefully left out much personal information from this website. This is for our privacy. While it is both my husband’s and my deep desire to share our own experiences to bless and encourage others, we also recognize the stereotypes that still exist surrounding mental health. Posting so publicly about such sensitive and personal experiences has it’s advantages but also disadvantages. You may also notice in many of my blog posts that I refer to my husband as “Love”. This is simply an easy name replacement, chosen because it is my favorite nickname for him. It is also very fitting since he is truly the love of my life. That being said, I hope the anonymity I have chosen does not overshadow the heart with which I write. May you be blessed by what you read here.

A LITTLE BIT ABOUT US
When I married my husband in 2017 I had no idea he was bipolar. Neither did he. He was aware something was going on in his mental space, but it was so normal to him that he had never felt the need to dredge it out into the open and give it a name.

Love and I met in Bible college, but didn’t start dating until after we both graduated. I was a little wary of the stereotypical “Bible college guy” at that time, and he had to work really hard to get a first date with me. That date did not go well, mainly because of misunderstood communication and my own preconceived idea of what his intent was. We dated other people for the next year, both broke up about the same time, and then met for coffee just to make up as friends. Long story short, we started dating and got married eight months later.

That first year of marriage from my perspective was beautiful, hard, blissful, growing, and good. I learned more about myself and my own selfish tendencies than I ever thought possible. We learned how to communicate and care for each other, as well as how to recognize and care for our own needs ourselves. That last one was huge for me especially as I am much better at caring for others than I am at caring for myself. By our first anniversary, we were both still growing a LOT but also starting to hit our stride and figure out how to work well together.

In the midst of all this, Love began to silently reach a breaking point. The stark contrast between his inner, mental life and his outer, beautiful life was something he couldn’t ignore anymore. The way of living that he was so accustomed to was being confronted with a life that could be, was within his grasp. It gave him hope that the daily craving for death was not normal – that there was another way to experience life. And with that hope came courage to admit he needed help.

We met with a doctor who diagnosed Love with Severe Clinical Depression. Six months later, we were noticing high manic-like episodes, and six months after that the doctor diagnosed Love with Type 2 Bipolar Depression. This was in 2019. Each diagnosis was a lot of new information for both of us to swallow, and we both sought counseling at various times throughout the process. Through those experiences, I have a growing heart to love and care for those who find themselves in a similar position.

THIS BLOG…
…is my attempt to minister to the hearts of those who have loved ones who struggle with mental health issues of any kind. I am not a psychologist, psychiatrist, or counselor. Anything shared here is purely based on my own experience and journey and not intended to replace the advice of a licensed practitioner. If you or your loved one is experiencing mental health struggles of any kind, please get help as soon as possible. Your life and well-being is worth it. My desire is for this blog to contribute in some small way to your health and healing.